Tools for Calling In Change
The New Moon is a time for planting seeds, starting something, calling in the magic we need for the next cycle. It is a moment of taking a breath after release, and in the moment of emptiness, beginning again. It is important for us to understand process, to understand the importance and relationship between all the many different (and shifting) steps of change. This New Moon, falling in Pisces, is a beautiful opportunity to understand this relationship more deeply. Pisces is the completion of a cycle, and holds the whole cycle.
Manifestation and the calling in of new patterns is not just about getting what we want. It is not just the goods at the end. It is a whole cycle that involves self-discovery, healing, release and opening to inspiration, imagination, and possibility. These steps (and others) are reflected in the phases of the moon, the seasons and eras of our lives. They can also be appropriately used at the turning of the moon from Dark to New (this one especially).
Here are some steps I am currently working with for shifting patterns and manifesting change in my life. The techniques are a combination of tools I learned from my teachers, Colette Gardiner and Pomegranate Doyle, and my own work. I am sharing all of them now because the astrology calls for it, and Pisces can both release and invoke, so they are a good cycle to go through for today's New Moon. They can also be generally used over the two weeks between the turning of the Full Moon to the New Moon, or any time your life demands a cycle of change.
Acknowledging the Need for Change
If you can name what you're working on, you will be able to guide yourself through the process with clarity and intention. (There will, of course, be times when this is impossible and surrender is the name of the game.)
This part takes courage and emotional intelligence. The more you are able to read your own cues without judgment, the better you will understand how you are needing, wanting, and trying to change. We give ourselves signals with our emotions, our bodies, our internal narratives, memories. Our guides give us signals through synchronicity, dreams, circumstances. Our job is to learn to listen to all this, humbly and perceptively, so that we can get clear about what needs to shift. It is particularly our job to know what, not always how.
There is a balance here in learning how to hold this in such a way that allows you to be flexible about what mode you are in. We can name the need to change in a way that favors release, or in a way that favors calling in. If you can phrase your awareness so that it leaves room for both (and everything in between), you will have an easier time moving through all the steps of the cycle. ("No more assholes!" vs "Calling in the love I need" vs "I'm working with how I engage with relationship." All powerful statements, some more related to specific phases of healing than the whole cycle.)
Naming Blocks and Fears
We are always responsible for our own healing. Learning to name how you block yourself and what motivates you to do so is one of the best ways to claim your power.
All of our fears are precious resources. They are a way we communicate with ourselves. Fear asks us to notice if we are safe. Beyond questions of basic survival, they reveal what is important to us, and how deep and multi-faceted our definition of safety actually is. If we are afraid of losing something, that something is important. When we fixate on the narrative we use to express the fear, we frequently lose our ability to receive the message the fear is trying to deliver. It becomes too easy to dismiss the messenger by ridiculing the story we've built to express the fear.
Name your fears. You can do this out loud, through writing or drawing, or in conversation with someone you trust. When you identify the most potent fears, reword them until you get to the heart. Our narratives are the starting point, not the heart of the fear. Pare it down to something simple-- "I'm afraid of being projected upon," "I'm afraid everything is my fault," "I'm afraid I'll be alone." Try to be in your body as you're doing this, so that you can track your emotional responses to what you're doing. If you catch yourself tensing, or dissociating, or getting nervous, or sleepy, or having any other of your common physical expressions of emotion, you know that you are working with fears that have power.
What you fear reveals what you value: If you are afraid of being projected upon, you value your own true nature. If you are afraid of being an impostor, you value your integrity. If you are afraid of being alone, you value connection. Knowing what you value allows you to take care of it, nurture it, honor it. It takes you out of the defensive stance and puts you back in your power. When you have named your fears, name the corresponding values it is your job to honor.
Claiming Responsibility and Releasing
Once you have named your fears and values, it is time to sort out what you have control over and what you don't. In the simplest terms: you have control over your own ways of engaging with life. You don't have control over anything else. Working with your named fears, notice what's actually in your hands. The answer is not nothing, even if everything you're afraid of is totally out of your control.
We build behaviors around our fears and they become our blocks. These are yours to name, release, change. These are where you have power. Even if you have no control over whether or not what you fear will come to pass, you still have control over how you take care of yourself, how you honor your process, what types of protection you choose.
Claim responsibility for what your fears are trying to protect. Make concrete commitments about how you will honor and protect those core values, while acknowledging where you don't have control.
The fear I am working with the most lately is around projection. I can't control whether or not (or how) I will get projected upon, and I most certainly will (hello, misogyny....). What I can do is commit to loving myself, agree to get better at it all the time, to continue healing and making more room for my own true nature, and to have boundaries that respect who I really am.
Once you have claimed responsibility for what you can, release the old behaviors and protections that have become blocks and tools for self-sabotage. Do this ritually if that is a good way of working for you. Ritual or no, ask yourself what kind of support you need to change the pattern (a buddy, a practitioner, a weekly check in with yourself, etc.), and be open to noticing the nuts and bolts of how you act this pattern out, and catching yourself when you go to reinforce it.
To support yourself in attending to your business of shifting your blocks, ask spirit to help you stop trying to control what you can't, and for support in dealing with the things that are out of your hands.
Opening to Possibility
We cannot call in the future without imagining things could be different. Imagination opens the gate to our ability to manifest. We need to be able to see ourselves without the blocks we have released. We need to find ways to invite in new patterns without getting too locked into specifics, so that we are leaving room for what is better than what we can currently imagine (this being shaped so thoroughly by our current relationship with ourselves, our conditioning and wounding, and experience).
If you are imagining with the mind (which is the guy that really likes to get detailed), go for it, but use a caveat: "This or something better."
We can also imagine with our bodies and emotions, and these have an easier time inviting in a frequency instead of specific circumstances that we have loaded with our ideas. An easy way to do this is to get centered and still and ask ourselves "What would it be like?" and let the body show us.
Working with my block caused by fear of projection, I asked my body to show me what it would feel like to love myself unconditionally. I let the concept settle in my body and felt it shift. I let the feeling expand and asked my mind to take note. Then I released it and asked my body what it would be like to surrender to my gifts. I let my energy shift and noticed how. I now have some energetic signatures that I can work with. Asking my energy to shift into these patterns does (at least) two things: It creates an invitation to circumstances that hold those signatures and it calibrates me to ideas that are counter to how I've been conditioned, which will help me to not create new forms of resistance. I will practice shifting into these patterns daily (and while the New Moon gate is open, multiple times a day), at least until the Full Moon.
Work with the ideas and commitments that come up for you in the Claiming Responsibility step to find good wordings. You can also convert the values revealed by your fears into useful "what would it be like" questions. If you feel resistance the first time you run the question by your body, remind yourself: you have time before this is the new reality, you are trying something on just for fun, and you are currently working with the realm of imagination (not to be underestimated at all, but this can be a good use for the shitty conditioning we've received about what imagination is). Once you have a set of shifts and sensations that feel like they hold part of the pattern of what you're calling in, notice the specifics (warm hands, open heart, tingling throat, etc). Let your body take on that state at least once a day, reminding yourself what it means. Allow yourself to embody it as fully as you can at any given moment, for as much time as feels right. Even 30 seconds will do something for you.
Werq it, Beauties! Heaps of blessings on you and yours in these rough and tumble times!